Something to Laugh About

by Carl Hauck

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I wrote and recorded these songs as a high schooler, so be kind!


released September 6, 2005



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Carl Hauck Chicago, Illinois

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Track Name: Absolute Relativity
Forget that last chord.
It doesn't exist now that it's in the past.
Overlook the history of dissonance
as long as the present is melodious.
A gunshot,
a kiss,
a word,
a breath -
out of context,
Track Name: Weekly Heretic
We have too many gods on this planet.
Forget that they're all self-proclaimed.
We were told by our parents, and with no real awareness,
had no doubt that we alone were saved.
So we zone out during all of their homilies
and take all of the old literature to heart.
Both are written by men in the name of divinity,
yet they're contradicting human opinions, and that's just the start.

We're deaf and we're blind, yet we're waging a battle;
we're killing over auditory and visual matters.
We take up our own jihad, forget about God.
Religion makes me lose faith in Man.

The message is always changing with time
as if we've been gaining insight
What's so wrong with uncertainty?
The only thing that's wrong is being certain that we're right.
Still we play Simon Says and take flesh as our bread,
citing obligation as the reason.
We confess all our sins and repeat them again
while condemning, blaspheming - like I'm doing right now.

Alleluia! We're deaf and we're blind,
yet we're waging a battle over our lies.
And we can't seem to make the best of our lives
when we're wasting our time with pride fixed in our eyes.
We're all wrong, putting words in His mouth
until He's arguing, arguing with Herself.
Track Name: Dissociation
He eats turkey for tradition, not the taste,
uses old movie lines as he touches her face
figures everybody's got a lover on the big screen
prefers his love advice from old Jim Beam

'Cuz beauty's in an empty bottle
as long as its contents are traveling through his insides

She's just never tasted right, but there's cocaine on her lips.
It's sad to hear him claim a thing when he's never felt it.
It's hard for him to deal with those stages in between
when the logic kicks in called sobriety

'Cuz beauty's in an empty bottle
as long as its contents are traveling through his insides

Is there any cure for this second brain?
Is there any cure for this second brain?
What is true? Love or lust?
What is true? Love or lust?
Tell him what is true. Tell him what is true.
Tell him what is true. Tell me what is true.
'Cuz I'm lying to this thing you call God,
and I'm lying to your friends,
and I'm lying to myself again,
and I'm lying to you.
Track Name: The Cell
So this is how solitude commences
With a paycheck in hand and only ghosts to spend it on
Twilight injects a dose of mounting apprehension
Alas, tomorrow's only nightmares away

Apologies for misconstrued pretension
Regret for every syllable that pumped the air between us
The past subsists again given the circumstances
And that's what I'm afraid of, yeah, that's what I'm afaid of

I have long conversations with the cultured television
And the silent companionship of the cordless telephone
But my whole heart's devoted to a slutty corporation
And I swear she loves me back, yeah, I swear she loves me back

Well these wages are happiness, I've got to start pretending
Despite the absence of a single vivid memory
Of reassurance, of stage props set for acting
Life's a joke, someday I'm hoping that I'll get it
Track Name: Words of the Wise
Wake up, my boy
Put on some clothes
And keep on going till you're dead or old
You see, life's about death and death's about life
Don't challenge the system, it ain't worth the strife

Speak up, my boy
Make yourself heard
You're just a vegetable when you don't say a word
You see, talking's the key, listening's overrated
There ain't nothing to hear but politics and radio

Start reading those books, boy
Get yourself learned
Use your time wise, though you've plenty to burn
You see, you read while you're young and write when you're old
Take the knowledge you're forced, only play when you're told

Drink up, my boy
Rum, rum, rum, rum, rum
You're too young to worry, yet too old for fun
You see, advice can only take you so far in life's fight
But take a few shots and you're set for the night

Take the train downtown
Sport some nice clothes
And don't stop working till you're dead or old
You see, all work and no play makes you a rich boy
Spend the big bucks and show off your toys

Find a girl, my boy
And make her your wife
Make sure you get along well, 'cause, well, you're stuck for life
You see, love ain't that important, it's just what they say
Just find a good bitch who won't get in the way

Have a son, my boy
Pass on the name
Forget blocks and letters, raise him for fame
What he wants don't matter, take it from me
'Cause you ain't worth a damn without a legacy Finally, my boy
You got time to rest
Till boredom or sickness leads you to death
You got the freedom that you yearned for as a child
But your smile's gone; you're too old and tired

So you sit in your wheelchair
At the end of the hall
Drooling on your bib and wondering how it all
Went by so

Well, I'll tell you, my boy
I just found out myself
We wrote our lives in chapters on scattered shelves
You see, life ain't in paragraphs, phrases or words
It's in every single letter of one big book

It's all you've ever seen
All you've ever dreamed
All you've cried for, laughed for,
Shouted and screamed

And you ask, my boy
"What's it all mean?
The crying, the laughing, those fleeting dreams?"
Though there's a pretty big chance that I could be wrong
I think you've listened to me for far too long

We're just making our way
Through an endless train
With no real conductors, only some self-proclaimed
We're all searching for the best path to the caboose
But the end don't matter, it's each car's view

It ain't too late
To have a look, my boy
So have a look, my boy
And choose your own
Track Name: Regretting the Future
Waiting - the story of our lives
The future's come and gone now too many times
Just one last night to wait for with nothing to lose
The lower the countdown, the lesser the excuse

Will we leave still holding our tongues,
Savoring the flavor of unrequited love?
Inaction at its finest, letting time pass us by
Four years fading quickly because of fear, because of pride

The perfect moment, the perfect place, the perfect time
Tainted by the absence of the one who never leaves your mind
You're a creep for feeling, this you can't deny
Let's hope that it's not hope that's keeping us alive
Or I'd be dying

And I don't want to die holding my tongue
Savoring the flavor of unrequited love
I don't want to give up that feeling I had when I was young
When time was endless until the lullabies were all sung
I'd close my eyes tightly and wait for the morning
I thought I'd never grow older, I could've sworn, I could have sworn
I thought I had time to tell you, turns out times a lie
Four years fading quickly because of fear, because of pride

Will we leave still holding our tongues,
Savoring the flavor of unrequited love?